Friendship between a man and a woman. Mission Impossible???

I just read a post regarding a boy-girl relationship from here.. which doesn't mean they are in a love relationship. Strictly just friends. And so the writer thought.. hmmm…

I’m reminiscing of ‘crushes’ in my life…

Guy No.1
Place: Angola, Indiana, US

On the last day of my kindergarten year, a boy gave me a self-drawn picture of me in a big red sweater. Awww… so sweet! I can’t remember what he wrote on the drawing but it made me smile.

Guy No.2
Place: Semporna, Sabah

I had this avid admirer when I was in standard five. His name was Rostam (Wafa’ tahu fasal mamat nih kot… hehe) and he was my neighbour. He was older than me by two years.

At first he’d send love letters in a language I hardly understand.. yet… (English was still my only known language then), I never replied. His younger sister was his poor postman.

Sometime later, he managed to kidnap my younger brother.

And demanded that I free my brother by meeting him at the ‘gates’.

That method didn’t work either.

It was a cat and mouse chase until I was sent to a boarding school eight hours away. Haha.. then my family moved to KK. Lost contact since then….

Guy No. 3
Place: KK, Sabah and Kota Samarahan, Sarawak

He was known as the guy with the red bag. My friends and I called him ‘BM’ (Beg Merah).. Zati, Wizza and Iffah knows this guy. Wafa’, too.

He and I went to the same secondary school…
went to the same matriculation college….
and then, by some twist of fate…
went to the same university… and the same department!

But I never had the guts to talk to him. I’d shy away. I had a secret crush on him since form 2 until I graduated in 2006. Perggh….. any advances from other guys were never entertained.


Then I went into adulthood.

Met a lot of guys… not one did I manage to get attracted to.. until I met Ming Ming. Sigh.. don’t want to talk about him. Haha..

But in the working environment, it’s hard to avoid interactions with the other gender.
And the question which always comes to mind…

Friendship between a man and a woman. Mission Impossible???
Thus I did a little bit of research and quote from this person


“ boys and girls approach each other very differently, in ways that can rather dramatically effect this question of friendship vs. romance.”

“ Boys are often more easily smitten and twitter pated by a girl's pretty face and attractive appearance, in such a way that they may initially be overwhelmed with this feminine beauty. They can "fall in love," in other words, before they've even gotten to know the girl who has become the object of affection. That kind of superficial attraction and infatuation presents a real obstacle to the development of a natural friendship, because it overloads the senses and glazes the eyes and fogs the brain. “

“Girls, on the other hand, do not seem to be quite so easily swept off their feet by appearances or first impressions. They are more interested in getting to know a boy, in relating to him as a person, testing his thoughts and behaviours, especially in reaction to various things. This very process is tantamount to the development of a friendship, and less prone to falling "head over heels" in romantic love. “

“……. any boy-girl conversation may automatically be interpreted as a sign of romance. Ironically, I would venture to guess that many a young boy engaged in such conversation with a pretty young girl is likely to be seeing stars and hearing bells and hoping with all his heart that love is in the air. He may not even be hearing the conversation, because he is captivated by the girl herself.”

“So, the general conclusion I have drawn is that a non-romantic friendship between a boy and a girl is much more difficult for a boy to begin with. But, as time goes by, and as the boy and girl get to know each other better, spending time doing ordinary, every-day sorts of things together, the boy is more and more likely to think of the girl as a friend, maybe like a sister. At the same time, however, the better the girl gets to know the boy, the more she relates to him and shares good times together with him, the more she may begin to feel a romantic attraction toward him. It seems a cruel sort of irony, but I really think this is generally the case. Of course, it can all be sorted out just fine, as it often is, but navigating the course is tricky and a bit of a challenge.”

Hah! So this means... women are more rational when it comes to a boy-girl relationship compared to men.. heheheh...

What say you???